Observations
Ray McInerny, Sr., and his wife Jean, have lived in New Berlin for 32 years. A retired graphic artist, he now paints for his own enjoyment. This blog will attempt to present items of general interest to his New Berlin neighbors.
Strong families prevent child abuse
"Everything useful and beneficial to man, seems to be connected with obedience to the lives of his nature, the inclinations, the duties, and the happiness of indviduals, resolve themselves into customs and habits, favorable, in the highest degree, to society. In no case is this more apparent, than in the customs of the nations respecting marriage. Samuel Williams, The Natural and Civil History of Vermont, 1794
So much of our time is spent on past abuses, with little attention paid to the here and now. Some find ourselves wrapped up in what happened fifteen, twenty or more years ago. There's a tendency to ignore or minimize the abuses taking place today. Heaping most of the blame on clergy, through the willing assistance of the media, our self-righteousness overlooks other present day problems. This is no defense of what some poor souls in the clergy did, but unfortunately they're not alone - and never were.
Every adult has the responsibility to act prudently when caring for, teaching, participating in activities with children, and use that time with care. We have been bombarded with too many cases of adults sleeping with children, suffocating them; young female predators seducing boys, coaches, instructors, teacher assistants invading the sanctity of young lives, bus drivers leaving infants to die in day care parking lots and numerous other instances of child abuse.
We've become so accustomed to having it "our" way from that time not long ago when we all rejected the antiquated notion that contraception is wrong. Once we accepted that, it led to promiscuous acts because anything was o.k. between consenting adults. The divorce rate began to escalate and damaged our civic life. We took to porno movies, CD's, girly magazines as our bible for the new era. Then abortion entered the scene and the real child abuse was born, so to speak. When abortion was too hard for some it gave us the mother without a husband style so prevelant today. Hollywood and the entertainment industry continues to elevate this situation to an unacceptable degree.
Our hedonistic, materialistic, self-centered society we've spawned made children a by-product of our fun, not the choice of thinking, loving, married adults. The courts and legislatures continue the assault on marriage with the spurious edicts presented that anything goes. The road ahead appears to be paved with the stones of destruction. The destruction of family life. Good, stable married life substituted for the anything at anytime love of self society we've embraced for too long seems to have won the day..
Until we reestablish the family, and all it's members, children will continue to be abused. Our national religion of sports and entertainment must be scaled back and the family placed foremost in the scheme of things. It really wouldn't be too bad to see a modern day version of the Ozzie and Harriet syndrome guiding our family untis. Until we want to establish marriage as the base unit all forms of child abuse will be part of the picture. Is that what we want?
7 COMMENTS
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Abortion has been around for decades. You know who did it when it was illegal? The mafia. And it was far more dangerous.
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Thanks for the comments. Appreciate them. I think Abigail says it best for me.......
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Had: Actually, I'm a big proponent of learning from the past, not living in it or embellishing it. If you check the history on my blog, you'll see that I've not attempted to sweep the Stancl case "under the rug"--rather I expressed outrage at the suggestion that there were prior alleged incidents in Stancl's history that were known by the State but could not be legally shared with our local district. Instead of referring to our superintendent as "compulsive, elitist, vain," I choose to challenge all to offer solutions, not attacks, and focus on improving our schools and community. If I continue to be brought to task for attempting to be positive, for being focused on solving problems, and for taking the high road, I can live with that and sleep well at night.
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I don't think there was any berating or invective being slung Ray. Keith just seems to be trying to make the point that people should not dwell on what has been done or who has done it and they should move on so as to keep things more peaceful. Unfortunately sweeping things under the rug does not fix the underlying problems. It's necessary to regurgitate the past so we can fix things in our city and schools correctly. If Keith was just throwing up random sayings about life in general I wouldn't have said anything at all but he's continuing to try and make a stand about not bringing up the past or getting mad about past actions taken by people and I simply disagree with his philosophy when those past actions and people are continuing to make yet more decisions and have a big impact on our schools and city.
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Had to:
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Ray....it's just hard to even respond to such a blog entry. Every generation seems to think everything is going to hell in a hand basket as they grow old. It's not. And things really were not all that rosy in those "golden days" of the perfect family. Your blog entry is just so out of touch with reality. Those golden days of the family were full of all the same horrors going on today, probably more. Today we benefit from tremendous communications and I think you're the victim of it. With all this news available to us we all think everything we see and read is invading our own personal lives when in fact very little of it is. I really don't think going back to the constricting, stuffiness of yesteryear is a desirable direction to travel.
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Ray,
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Back to topTheComedian - Nov 03, 2009 12:06 PM - Report Abuse
Child abuse has been around for ages too. The 50's weren't all that 'golden' if you were a member of a minority race now were they? Or a woman.
All that stuff was there, you just couldn't see it. While I will agree that people are far more stupid and self-involved than they were, I really don't think the 50's are where we want to be.
And as a gay man in a serious long term relationship, I wonder where I fit into your plan of 'anything goes' marriage edicts.
Ray McInerny - Oct 28, 2009 10:30 AM - Report Abuse
"What is it that affectionate parents require of their Children; for all their care, anxiety, and toil on their accounts? Only that they would be wise and virtuous, Benevolent and kind." --Abigail Adams, letter to John Quincy Adams, 1783
Happy Halloween and have a wonderful weekend, after Rodgers dumps you know who on his you know what! Go Pack!
Keith Hastings - Oct 26, 2009 9:31 PM - Report Abuse
Ray, Thank you for the kind words. My apologies if this response pulls this thread irretrievably off course.
had to comment - Oct 26, 2009 5:14 PM - Report Abuse
Ray McInerny - Oct 26, 2009 3:17 PM - Report Abuse
While you tend to admonish me for seeing so much good and rosiness in the "golden days" you hop on over to Keith's blog and berate him for not learning from the past. Which is it? Or do you have several ghost writers?
Keith's blog was interesting and didn't need the invective slung his way. Considering what you siad to him you may want to re-read Dr. Seigel - and adopt some of his thoughts.
had to comment - Oct 23, 2009 4:04 PM - Report Abuse
Stunned - Oct 23, 2009 9:48 AM - Report Abuse
Good blog. One of the huge issues is the lack of involvement by agencies which are there to aid in protecting children. Alot of children are left in dangerous situations way too long and in some cases end up dead. While Child Care agencies are being investigated for fraud, maybe there does need some attention paid to a broken Foster Care system and the fact that it is failing children's chances to a better life.